Clearly I don’t know what Netlify is truly capable of. Apparently it has a serverless feature. Will use this guide of sorts a Mastodon mutual wrote to set up a microblog endpoint on my site.
Edit: Masto moot shared a repo with some pretty good documentation on how to implement a serverless micropub with Netlify.
Do I want to see whether I have all the piece set up a microblog on my site? I don’t wanna know just yet (ง ื▿ ื)ว